frequently asked questions
welcome to our FAQ on non-Binary topics
Gender is a vast and diverse spectrum, and understanding non-binary identities is an important step toward creating a more inclusive and supportive society. Whether you’re exploring your own gender identity, seeking to support a non-binary loved one, or simply looking to learn more, you have landed on the right page!
We’ve compiled frequently asked questions in three categories:
- General FAQ: Covering the basics about non-binary identities and experiences.
- If you are or think you might be non-binary: Guidance for those who are, or think they might be, non-binary.
- For family, friends, teachers, or co-workers: Tips on how to support and affirm the non-binary people in your life.
Explore the answers, learn something new, and join us in celebrating gender diversity!
General FAQ
What does it mean to be non-binary?
Being non-binary means that your gender identity does not align strictly with the categories of male or female. Some non-binary individuals feel they embody both genders, others feel they fall entirely outside of those categories, and some experience their gender as fluid, meaning it can change over time. Non-binary is an umbrella term, and not all non-binary individuals identify in the same way.
Is being non-binary a trend?
In recent years, it was possible to observe a rise in people openly identifying as non-binary, which led some to believe that non-binary identities are a trend that didn’t exist before. However, the growing number of people coming out as non-binary is a result of better education and wider societal acceptance. Nowadays, it is easier for some to openly talk about their gender identity and express themselves, which makes us more visible.
What are pronouns?
Pronouns are words used to refer to people in place of their names. They represent a person’s gender identity and can include options like he/him, she/her, they/them, and more. Pronouns can change over time, and individuals may use multiple sets of pronouns to reflect their identity, such as he/they or she/they.
Is there a difference between non-binary and transgender?
Transgender people is a term to describe those who don’t identify with the gender assigned to them at birth. Some transgender people are non-binary, which means that their gender doesn’t fit in the categories of men and women.
What are some of the unique health concerns that are faced by non-binary people?
Non-binary people often encounter barriers in accessing general medical as well as gender-affirming healthcare, such as being forced to select male or female on medical forms. Mental health challenges are also common due to societal stigma and lack of acceptance.
Can non-binary people medically transition?
Yes, non-binary people may opt for a medical transition, such as hormone therapy or surgeries, to align their physical appearance with their gender identity. For example, some may want to undergo a mastectomy (often referred to as “top surgery”) or take hormones without pursuing all aspects of a binary transition. Medical transition is entirely optional and does not define one’s gender identity. It should also be taken into account that some people might not be able to medically transition for financial, medical or other reasons.
If you are or think you might be non-binary
I think I might be non-binary - what to do?
You don’t have to do anything! Gender expression is a very personal thing. You don’t have to have all the answers or immediately find a label that perfectly describes you. Give yourself time for reflection and exploration. Think of what you like and what makes you comfortable. Meeting other non-binary people might help you find your community and process some of the doubts.
Good to know: Let’s Talk About Nonbinary roundtables are for questioning people too. If you think you might be nonbinary, but you aren’t sure, you are welcome to join us.
Do I have to change my name if I’m non-binary?
Not at all. While some non-binary people choose a new name that feels more affirming, others may feel comfortable with their current name or prefer to use a nickname. There’s no single “correct” way to approach this; it’s all about what feels best for you.
Am I non-binary enough?
Being non-binary is about self-determination, not fitting a mold. You don’t have to look or feel a certain way to identify as non-binary. Express yourself however you want. In our collective, non-binary individuals are welcome as they are, there is no gender policy. Come as you are, be yourself, express yourself and your gender however you like. At Let’s Talk About Non-Binary, no one will judge or invalidate you. We are also here to empower you and help you find the answers to your questions.
Can I identify as non-binary and still dress in a traditionally masculine or feminine way?
Absolutely! Clothes are just one form of self-expression and don’t define your gender. Whether you wear dresses, suits, or something in between, your identity as a non-binary person is valid. Some people enjoy experimenting with androgynous fashion, while others stick to what feels most comfortable, regardless of societal gender norms.
How can I deal with people who misgender me?
Being misgendered can be frustrating and hurtful. If it feels safe, you can calmly correct the person by saying something like, “I use they/them pronouns.” If someone repeatedly misgenders you despite knowing your preferences, you may need to set firmer boundaries. Surrounding yourself with supportive people who respect your identity can make a big difference. Remember, you don’t have to educate everyone—it’s important to prioritize your mental health and safety.
Is there a legal way to change my gender markers to “X” in Belgium?
Unfortunately, it is not yet possible to change your gender marker to “X” or to use any other neutral gender marker in Belgium. This means that many non-binary people cannot or are hesitant to change their gender marker in accordance with their gender identity.
For family, friends, teachers and employers of non-binary folks
What should I do if someone comes out to me as non-binary?
If someone tells you they are non-binary, it means they trust you will accept that identity. A good thing to do in that situation, is to make sure you use the correct name, pronouns, and grammatical forms, when referring to that person. There is no one correct pronoun or grammatical form used by all non-binary people, which is why it is completely normal that you won’t immediately know everything. In such situations, open communication is key.
If you just met a new person, you can use the name and pronouns they introduced themselves with. If you didn’t hear it well or aren’t sure how to use these pronouns, don’t be afraid to ask.
If you knew this person before they came out as non-binary, you can ask:
- Should I use a different name? If yes, what is it?
- Which pronouns do you want to use from now on?
- Is there anything I can help you with so that you can feel more comfortable?
Some words in English are strongly gendered, and you might want to be careful using them. Words describing relations within a family often have a gender-neutral version, for example, brother/sister -> sibling, mother/father -> parent. If you have a doubt, just ask.
If this person is your close friend, partner or a part of your family, it is important to remember that they are still the same and that your relationship doesn’t have to drastically change. Gender doesn’t define us and there is no reason to stop being close to each other. If you want to be even more supportive, you can actively search for additional information or even get involved on an activist level, by joining protests for transgender rights or supporting foundations helping LGBT+ people. In some cities, there are also special groups for family members of transgender people to support each other.
How do I ask about someone’s pronouns without being offensive?
You can politely ask by saying something like, “What pronouns do you use?” This shows respect and a willingness to learn. If you feel nervous, try introducing yourself with your own pronouns first, such as, “Hi, I’m Alex, and I use she/her pronouns. What about you?” This normalizes the conversation and creates a safe space for them to share.
What to do if I use the wrong pronoun?
If you have trouble remembering someone’s pronouns, don’t worry. Just correct yourself when you notice a mistake and keep on trying. If you get corrected, you can simply say sorry, and use the correct pronoun next time.
How can I support my non-binary loved one?
Supporting your loved one starts with respecting their name, pronouns, and gender identity. Educate yourself about non-binary issues so they don’t feel burdened with teaching you. Offer emotional support and stand up for them if you witness others being dismissive or disrespectful. Small actions, like correcting someone’s pronouns, show you’re an ally.
How do I talk about my non-binary loved one with others?
Respect their privacy and preferences. Ask them how they’d like you to refer to them when speaking with others and whether it’s okay to disclose their gender identity. Always prioritize their comfort over others’ curiosity.
My student/employee is non-binary. How can I help them feel more included?
Creating an inclusive environment for a non-binary student or employee requires intentional effort and thoughtful practices. Here are some steps you can take to support them:
- Respect their pronouns and name.
Ask your student or employee what pronouns they use and ensure you consistently use them, along with their chosen name, in all interactions. If you make a mistake, briefly apologize, correct yourself, and move forward without drawing unnecessary attention to it. - Normalize sharing pronouns.
Foster an inclusive environment by normalizing pronoun sharing for everyone. For example, include your pronouns in email signatures, name tags, and introductions, which signals that your space is inclusive and respectful of gender diversity. - Use inclusive language.
Avoid gendered language like “ladies and gentlemen” or “sir” and “ma’am.” Instead, use neutral terms like “everyone,” “team,” “students,” or “colleagues.” When writing policies or addressing groups, ensure your language is inclusive of all gender identities. - Provide gender-neutral facilities.
If possible, ensure there are gender-neutral bathrooms or changing spaces available and clearly labeled. This helps non-binary individuals feel comfortable and reduces anxiety about accessing facilities. - Respect privacy and confidentiality.
If your student or employee shares their non-binary identity with you, ask them how they’d like this information to be handled. Avoid disclosing it to others unless they’ve given explicit permission. - Educate yourself and others.
Take the initiative to learn about non-binary identities through resources, workshops, or training sessions on gender diversity. This will help you avoid putting the burden of education on your student or employee. Consider organizing awareness sessions for your workplace or school to create a more inclusive culture overall. - Adapt systems and policies.
Review your workplace or school’s policies, forms, and databases to ensure they are inclusive. For example, allow for a third gender option or the use of “they/them” pronouns. Flexible dress codes, instead of gender-specific ones, also support inclusivity.
Still have questions?
If you didn’t find the information you were looking for, feel free to contact us – we’re here to help! You can also explore more on our resources page for additional information.